There’s a battle raging outside of all of our front doors. It’s on the playground, in the mall and at school. You fight it when you feed your kids, dress your kids, talk to your kids or discipline your kids in front of other moms.
You, probably, sometimes take the offensive and attack others, as well. It’s not something that moms are proud to admit, but it is happening… EVERYWHERE.
Why?
Well, let’s be honest, first and foremost the “Mommy Wars” are being fought because mothers are insecure. They think that they’re somehow not as good as other moms and, in a hare trigger reaction, begin to lash out in fear at other innocent mothers. It’s sad but true that mothers are not supporting one another but constantly attacking and belittling one another. We are all getting our shots in.
I would be hard pressed to find any mom who hasn’t been guilty of going on the offensive at least a couple of times.
How do we do it?
We do it with nasty looks, eye rolls, sarcastic grins and head shakes. We do it on social media and in our conversations with friends and even with our husbands (who are typically smart enough to side with us). We are losing sight of the truth: Parenting is hard for all of us.
What are we battling over?
We are fighting to prove that we are on the “right” side of every parenting debate…
- Breast milk v. Formula
- Cry it out vs. Soothe
- Spanking v. Time Out
- Public vs. Private School
- Working Moms v. Stay at Home Moms
It seems to start early with the breastfeeding issue and then we continue to battle about co-sleeping vs. sleep training.
How can she give her baby a bottle? we say in disgust.
Why won’t she just let her baby cry it out? we whisper critically.
Oh, but it certainly doesn’t stop there. It seems to go on until children are just about grown… and then, sometimes, continues.
Why didn’t they save to help her with college? we mutter with superiority.
What kind of idiots spend that kind of money on a car for an 18 year old? we judge.
Here is the real question:
How is this type of critical and self-serving banter helping ANYONE? Easy, it isn’t helping anyone AT ALL.